Archive for the ‘Travel’ Category

In search of the perfect orange, part 4

Thursday, January 20th, 2011
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Left a good hotel (the Inn on the Lake) in an average town (Sebring) and drove not to Orlando as planned but to Mt. Dora, an hour north of the city. Drove past the small park we saw five years ago when we left the kids at Disney. Ate at the same restaurant near the lake and the railroad tracks, Pisces Rising—nice but a bit pricey. The town is quaint but overrun with hundreds of thousands of people during several festivals each year, according to a very nice woman at the local chamber of commerce.

We said we live in a resort area and complimented her on the sign hanging on the door: “We treat our visitors like family.”

She laughed. “But we treat our family like crap.”

“That part of the sign must have fallen off.”

Instead of touring the town, we headed to the post office. We have to carry heavy client training manuals home and decided that we’ll never get them on the airplane without hocking the rental car. So we’ll mail them. The guy at the post office was very friendly. Then we drove around Lake Dora and through Eustis (a tad too commercial) around Lake Eustis and north on CR 452 past Lake Yale (an OK place but few trees for that all-important shade in summer). Then west to Leesburg and Lake Griffin and Lake Harris and finally south to the Rosen Centre Hotel on International Drive. Dinner at Thai Thani, a chain that didn’t feel like a franchise, its interior dark and ornamental, the food spicy, the service attentive.

Tuesday, Jan. 11. The Rosen is a tall, wide hotel that aspires to elegance and succeeds in most ways. The public spaces are vast and tastefully decorated, the rooms small but comfortable. Some guests complained there were no refrigerators or microwaves in the rooms but we didn’t miss them. The hotel charges extra for everything—parking, Internet and use of the spa—but does a good job with housekeeping and food service.

Breakfast in the Café Gauguin was hot and fresh, a buffet with everything from oatmeal to eggs to fruit, although the orange juice wasn’t as good at the liquid gold in Sebring. We sat through a sales meeting in the afternoon for our client Aqua Glass, then joined a group dinner (14 of us) at the Everglades Restaurant in the Rosen. Very elegant, with three wait staff and pictures drawn on plates in edible gel. Big, rich, expensive meal but a nice way to kickoff the show, in the company of some very interesting and considerate people.

Sunset on Lake Eustis

Sunset on Lake Eustis

In search of the perfect orange, part 3

Wednesday, January 19th, 2011
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Breakfast at the Cabot Lodge (named for former UN Ambassador Henry Cabot Lodge?) south of Gainesville was about the same at the Holiday Inn near Ocala only we sat near an open fireplace. And the orange juice is getting better, although nothing to write home about. (Is blogging a form of writing home?)

Driving south on Route 27 from Gainesville to Sebring we took a right on Lake Minneola Road because the name sounded nice and headed into the small town of Clermont. In the historic downtown we found clean, quiet streets for a Saturday, mile temperatures (long-sleeved shirt weather, maybe close to 60). Stopped at Liz’s Ice Cream & Deli for lunch with a table of about 10 senior citizens and Liz behind the counter making sandwiches. Very, very friendly people. Two were Kiwanians and one a Rotarian, in their 60s and 70s and maybe early 80s. They talked about sex and getting drunk the previous night. Must be the Florida heat.

We drove around the south shore of Lake Minneola and were impressed with the public spaces—beach and pavilion, walking and bike paths and what looked like an amphitheater under construction. Big lake with some chop from the wind but it wasn’t undergoing eutrophication as so many of the shallow lakes in this part of central Florida.

After lunch we drove to Sebring and checked into the Inn on the Lake, a beautiful three-story hotel in the Spanish style across the highway from Lake Jackson, with a view of Little Lake Jackson from the room. There was a pool for lounging and groups of friendly, talkative people. Golfers we guessed from the tournament sign-in sheet in the lobby. Most in their 60s, a few younger, a few older. They sat in the back of the lobby by the fireplace and talked about getting laid. What’s with this generation?

Drove through an industrial area for dinner at the Blue Crab, a cross between a restaurant and clam shack, a place for seniors, blue-collar retirees and (finally) locals. It’s owned by a couple of bikers. The waitresses looked lean and nicotine burned. Ours was named Mel. Before she took our order she introduced herself as Big Bird and said that her boss, Bill, calls her Turkey Buzzard. She leaned toward us and in a conspiratorial whisper said, “I told him, ‘You call me that because I eat a lot of shit around here, so it must be true.’” Then she reared back quickly as if she’d given offense. Not at all. If she wants to burn her ears she should hike up the road and watch the old folks strut their nine irons.

Sunday, Jan. 9. Finally we have reached the summit: at the Inn on the Lake the orange juice is excellent, fresh-squeezed, the waitress said, by a local company. After breakfast we drove south to the small town of Lake Placid to see if lived up to its name. It did, maybe a bit too much. In Sebring the business district consisted of a couple of stores and a consignment shop on a rotary. Here there isn’t even a business district. And once outside town things got thin rather quickly. Around the lake some homes backed onto water but they were crushed together, on busy highways and fully exposed to the sun. Not much fun in August.

Lunch at the Tower View Restaurant in Lake Placid—second time we stumbled onto one of the more popular restaurants for locals. Then north to the Sebring International Raceway, home of the 12-hour Grand Prix, where we spent half an hour watching small noisy cars race around a very long track.

Back home to have a drink by the pool, dinner at the hotel restaurant and a wild evening doing laundry. Tomorrow the real world beckons as we head to Orlando to cover the International Builders Show at the Orange County Convention Center.

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In search of the perfect orange, part 2

Tuesday, January 18th, 2011
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It’s Wednesday and time for lunch with members of the Ocala Metro Rotary Club. About 25 Rotarians, a favorable mix of young and old, gathered in the back of the Marion County United Way Building, a blue stucco affair with dark blue pillars in a nicely shaded area. These people are fast as well as friendly. The entire meeting lasted half an hour, from the call to order through lunch, the recitation of the Four Way Test and the Pledge of Allegiance. Met the perfect host and greeter, a real estate agent by the name of Trish Kilgore, who said there isn’t much property on a lake near Ocala where motorboats are not allowed. She suggested we should consider a place on a river. We thought about that in New Bern when we visited the provincial capital of North Carolina last year but ruled it out for the moment.

Spent the afternoon in the Appleton Museum browsing the collections of European art and Florida paintings. “Reflections: Paintings of Florida, 1865-1965” included work by household names such as Wyeth and Tiffany but my favorites were the broad impressionistic works of Anthony Thieme (1888-1954), the Dutch-born painter who moved to Massachusetts. The exhibit contained three of his works: The Loquat Tree, Evening Light on the Suwannee River and Aviles Street Garden, all done around 1940.

It was ten of five, close to closing. The sky opened, the rain came down as if it meant someone harm. A museum guard loaned me an umbrella to run to the car and bring it in front of the building, and away we went to find an authentic place to eat, the kind of place the locals favor. Of course we can’t always deliver on that culinary mission and wound up at a barbecue joint called Sonny’s. (Didn’t realize the corrugated metal place was a franchise until we saw another one in Gainesville.)

Thursday, Jan. 6. After a late breakfast at the hotel we left Ocala for a drive through historic Micanopy. The buildings look worn and in need of reinforcement and paint. In this case the term historical means neglected. But it’s a quiet little town with dogs in baby carriages and friendly servers in the local sandwich shop. At the Coffee N Cream a half dozen men played cards at a table on the sidewalk, a dog at their feet, while we ate egg salad and chicken salad and sipped water and coffee (saving the juice for the AM) on the porch of the café and warmed ourselves in the sun. In early January. A treat in itself.

After that we headed north to the outskirts of Gainesville, home of the University of Florida Gators, and checked into a Cabot Lodge near I-75. Different vibe than in Ocala—more crowds, more traffic, with a card in the room warning guests to lock their doors and hide their cash and valuables. Sounds like Dallas.

Dinner at Amelia’s, just behind the Hippodrome Theatre in Gainesville. I called the restaurant to see if they had any red sauce without certain ingredients and Chef Andy himself returned my call. None of the bad stuff, he said, and they make all of their sauces by hand. So we dined on eggplant parmesan and angel hair with marinara. Beautiful. Chef Andy, dressed in a double-breasted black smock and pajama pants, stopped by our table to introduce himself and see how everything was. Very nice, and within a few feet of the theater.

The highlight of the trip: two seats in the front row at the Hipp for the preview of End Days. Wonderful storyline, passionate acting. Directed by Lauren Caldwell, the play is funny, dramatic and touching, one of the first attempts I’ve seen that deals with the aftermath of 9/11. (I posed a review on this blog at the time called “It’s the end of the world and we like it.”)

Friday, Jan. 7. We’re sitting in Starbuck’s in downtown Gainesville using the free Wi-Fi network. We spent the morning at Palm Point Park at Lake Newnan, walking under live oaks shrouded with Spanish moss that looked like the shredded remnants of ghosts. After driving through the University of Florida campus and peeking into the bookstore with its lines of students buying and selling texts, we had a late lunch at Harry’s (a Louisiana gumbo kind of place that didn’t feel like a franchise) and wound up outside the Hippodrome Theatre again. We’re seeing the indie film “Nowhere Boy” about John Lennon’s teen years.

The film was bit slow but rich in detail about Lennon’s conflicted relationship with his mother, Julia, and the woman who raised him, his Aunt Mimi. And then, as the house lights went up, three old timers with acoustic guitars strolled in and led the audience in a sing-along of Beatles’ songs written by Lennon, including some challenging ones like “I am the Walrus” and “Day in the Life” and one that pushed the bounds of irony, “Happiness is a Warm Gun.” Nearly everyone in the theater sang along with the first six or seven. I couldn’t remember the words to “Happiness” but the woman in front of us with the sculpted gray hair knew the lyrics.

“How do you guys know all the words?” one of the musicians asked, a little disingenuously I thought but in good fun. He was a bearded guy who might have played with the Four Freshman or Peter, Paul and Mary, or he could have opened for Jesus.

“Because we’re OLD,” shouted one of the men in the audience and we all laughed, knowing this was more of a call-and-response since nearly everyone in the theater was a baby boomer. But not old. Young baby boomers. The trailing edge. Not a one of us breaking into the chorus of “When I’m 64.”

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In search of the perfect orange, part 1

Monday, January 17th, 2011
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Two days after New Year’s we flew from Allentown, Pa., to Orlando International for a tour of Central Florida’s lake district and a search for real orange juice. I carried a mangled nest of electronic devices and cords for coverage of the International Builders Show the following week. My wife had packed a half-dozen books and manuals so she could rewrite her school district’s curriculum while I worked the trade show.

One of our suitcases weighed 57 lbs., 7 lbs. over the limit. I’m not saying whose suitcase. The airline people wanted to charge us $49 in addition to the $20 fee per checked bag. We carried the books on board the plane. The flight took off at 5:43 p.m. and landed about two hours later. We got in earlier than expected but still later than we’re used to flying. Nearly another hour to take the shuttle to ground transportation, retrieve the luggage and rent the car (present your pink rental sheet to the guy in the booth on the way out). Then a nearly two-hour drive north on great black highways through low-lying country to Silver Springs, just east of Ocala.

Tuesday, Jan. 4. Explore the Ocala National Forest. Drive east on Route 314 looking for 314A and lakes but they’re harder to find than you’d think, and all of the land surrounding them is privately owned and virtually inaccessible. Drove past great stands of pine, their trunks blacked from controlled burns. Past trailers and junk yards and small houses—quite a contrast to Lido Key and St. Armand’s Circle, our destination last year. Spanish moss hung like scarves from live oak trees, palms cracking, dry leaves scudding across the pavement.

We drove down sand-covered roads with dust billowing, clouds wispy, the sun warm on our backs as we walked a pier on Lake Kerr and watched the powerboats bob at the makeshift marina next door, dogs howling in the background, a trio of orange trees dropping fat fruit on a green lawn.

We pulled off Highway 19 for lunch at the Square Meal, a small restaurant near the office for the Ocala National Forest. The Square Meal looks like a local hangout, sandwiched between a real estate office and a Laundromat. Big red Coke sign on the wall next to a rack of fish hooks. Many of the men and two girls were dressed in camo jackets and caps. Several women ordered the special—fried pork loin with white gravy. Pay at the counter on the way out, cash only.

Dinner was ordinary but good at the Outback franchise near our hotel, the Holiday Inn Express in Silver Springs, a new, clean and friendly place with complimentary breakfast. The only complaint: for the heart of the citrus industry, the orange juice was surprisingly bad, tasteless and watery. Florida supplies 40% of the world’s orange juice. Let’s hope they don’t get this stuff.

Lunch at the Square Meal

Lunch at the Square Meal

D is for dream

Thursday, December 2nd, 2010
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I picked up a collection of short stories Ray Bradbury wrote in the 1940s and 1950s, R is for Rocket, created before the dawn of the space age. An ancient paperback, its pages as brown as parchment . . . a book I’d read in high school, dreaming of the day humans would fill the vast emptiness among the stars. I haven’t read science fiction in years because the older I grow the more trite it seems, its stories filled with brave commanders of vast armies of hollow ships and mindless machines.

r_is_for_rocketAnd then I read the title story, about a 15-year-old boy and his best friend who watch the rockets blast off on their way to the moon and long for a life neither thinks he’ll ever see. And I knew at once why I’d enjoyed Bradbury as a kid: he writes with heart. He captures what people feel but can’t seem to describe, even to themselves. He writes about a boy who wants the rocket to knock the stars out of orbit and wants to be there when it does, who feels the kick of liftoff in his chest and abandonment in his soul.

“It gripped me in such a way I knew the special sickness of longing and envy and grief for lack of accomplishment,” he thinks as other men trace his dreams like the imaginary lines that form our constellations. Bradbury writes about an old man who understands the heart of a prehistoric creature called out of the depths by a fog horn on a lighthouse. About a father who can only send one family member on a trip to Mars and instead gives all of his children the gift of imagination.

As Bradbury did.

Sarasota Noir, part 5: a three-ring heist

Thursday, February 25th, 2010
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He sped past the Van Wezel center, a purple bunker that sits on the waterway between Sarasota and the keys, and watched the marquee flash the names of the performers: the Moody Blues, Joffrey Ballet, “Mama Mia!” As he pulled into the Ringling museum complex off Tamiami Trail, he hoped he wasn’t too late. Dukat and the Pelican Boys had a head start. And then there was McGee. A great but volatile detective. Gulls were no match for his powerful hands, even with a splinted finger, and he wanted Dukat alive.

Asolo Theater webThe Asolo Theater was empty, its huge red curtain and gilded crown molding glowing in the dim light. He jogged to the visitors’ center and down to Ca d’Zan, the Venetian palace circus impresario John Ringing and his wife Mabel built in 1925 as their winter home on the intracoastal waterway between Sarasota and the keys. It seemed every surface was covered in ornamentation, a riot of gilded, carved and bejeweled ceilings, walls and floors. Rococo squared. He didn’t know how the couple slept at night.

Tons of tourists but no Dukat.

He ran up the walkway to the Ringling Museum of the American Circus, which housed the Ringling Bros. human canon, bandwagon, calliope and Pullman car John Ringling used to travel the country when booking his shows. No sign of Dukat or McGee, although he did see the patchwork hat and suit of Emmett Kelly, the sad-faced clown who would sweep his spotlight into a dustpan.

Ca d Zan front webThere were several other buildings but little time. John Ringling had made a good living by running the Ringling Bros. Circus and selling real estate in the circus’s winter home of Sarasota, Florida. He’d used that money to buy art from around the world, including works by Rubens, Titian and Velazquez. He’d also acquired Cypriot, Greek and Roman antiquities, along with hundreds of pieces of sculpture. That’s where he’d find Dukat.

He dashed in the door of the Ringling Museum of Art and took a hard right into grand hall that was dimly lit. Ahead loomed a series of paintings by Peter Paul Rubens called “The Triumph of the Eucharist.” One in particular caught his eye. At the far end of the hall stood the massive “The Meeting of Abraham and Melchizedek,” 175 by 224 inches, painted around 1625. In it Abraham the returning warrior was offering the priest a tithe in return for bread and wine for his army. The skin on the figures was luminous, the muscles so well-defined they look real.

And then one of the men moved. Carving knife poised, Dukat paused just before slashing through the edge of the painting. But in that second’s distraction, he lunged for the thief and his henchmen.

Rubens Meeting of Abraham webThey scattered, gulls and pelicans flying everywhere. He bounced hard on the floor. By the time he caught his breath, Dukat was gone. Outside he saw a car streak south toward the Van Wezel. He followed, hanging a right into the parking lot and nearly toppling a row of palms. Up the steps and into the lobby, where even the interior of the building was painted in that strange color. No sign of the gull. He ran to the left, through the concession area and around to stage left, leaping onto the boards just in time to see McGee grab the gull by the throat.

“Wait,” he yelled to McGee. “I want him alive.”

McGee was having trouble with the chokehold. With its splinted finger his hand refused to close.

“Don’t do it, McGee. What do you think this is?”

“With due respect to the master,” McGee said, looking heavenward to where the late John D. MacDonald might or might not be resting, “it’s a purple place for dying.”

Sarasota Noir, part 4: in search of Travis McGee

Thursday, February 25th, 2010
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If you’re going to deal with Gull Dukat, you need major league help.

He set out in search of Travis McGee, or more to the point, the haunts of mystery writer John D. MacDonald, who set the McGee novels on a houseboat in Fort Lauderdale but lived on Siesta Key. His house is located on the key side of Big Sarasota Pass but it’s private. He drove south on Siesta Key Drive through dense foliage, then took a left onto Midnight Pass Road to the Siesta Royale, a 1970s-era resort the kind that MacDonald may have experienced. It’s an apartment complex now with shiny white-peaked roofs and motel-style parking in front of each unit.

Crescent Club sign webA littler further south on Midnight Pass sat the Crescent Club, a bar that featured prominently in MacDonald’s standalone novel Condominium. The bar’s made of gray snow fencing and fronts the busy road. The inside was as dark as a cave. A rounded bar took up one side of the room, cigarette burns on its top, whiskey bottles and upside down glasses lining the wall. Tables with red cloths and seats took up the rest of the space. The décor consisted of three TVs on the wall, portraits of women and aerial views of Siesta Key and school flags and pennants—Michigan, Miami, Gators. A jukebox played Madonna’s “Holiday.”

It was 2:30 on a Tuesday afternoon and already there were 12 patrons at the bar, 10 men and 2 women, the women sitting in front of packs of cigarettes and amber-colored plastic lighters, the men ordering Bud Light and Coors Light. They were salty dogs, guys with beards and camouflage caps.

Crescent Club interior webTwo sat at the end of the bar. One was broad and short with fine white hair. Looked like he worked on the waterfront. The other was tall and razor thin with a thatch of red hair. Looked like he burned easily. They were staring at the TV, at an ad that promised bankruptcy papers for $175. The short guy shook his head. The redhead started talking about new regulations from the Obama administration that would restrain the credit card operations of major banks and the lengths to which those banks were going to maintain their income from fees.

“I thought bankruptcy cost at least a thousand dollars,” the bartender said and slid down to serve him. She was in her mid-thirties with long dark hair, cinnamon skin and a luminous smile. She was wearing a red-striped T-shirt that gaped when she bent over the sinks. The afternoon’s entertainment. He ordered a beer.

“You want a glass?”

“No thanks,” he said.

“What’s your name?”

“Sam. Sam Ho.”

“Ho,” she said. “You a gardener?”

“Used to be, in LA.”

“Sam, like in Sam Spade?”

“More genteel,” he said. “This is Siesta Key.”

She cracked a smile that lit up her cheekbones.

“You see any suspicious characters?”

“Just you.”

It was his turn to laugh.

“Who you looking for?”

He thought about whether to tell her. Decided why not.

“Travis McGee, the salvage expert.”

She cocked her head. “You need something salvaged?”

“Yeah,” he said. “My life.”

“Can’t help you, sailor, but maybe he can.” She nodded to her left.

At the same time he felt a hand, big and moist, on his shoulder and turned to see the guy who’d been watching from the end of the bar. Short, blocky guy with fine white hair, his right index finger in a metal splint.

“You McGee?”

“You a cop?”

“Writer. Down here looking for you.”

Crescent Club exterior webMcGee chuckled, a low rumble like a dump truck. “What can I do for you?”

He told him about Dukat and his gang from St. Croix and the Pelican Boys down from New York and his suspicion that they were here for a heist.

“What does this heist involve?”

“Paintings.” He told McGee his theory.

McGee nodded toward the red-haired man. “My associate Meyer and I will discuss it.” McGee named his fee and wrote a number on a napkin.

He emerged from the bar, blinded by the sunlight, got in the car and headed north on Tamiami Trail, past all the landmarks of modern FLorida, the Olive Gardens and Repo Depot, Sarasota Memorial Hospital and Walgreens. Then he was on the road less traveled, riding past the Mel-O-Dee and Cadillac motels with rooms for $29 a night, past North Trail Liquors and Mom’s Bail Bonds. He didn’t know exactly what Gull Dukat and his gang were planning but he had a good idea. Their target was straight ahead.

Sarasota Noir, part 3: trouble in paradise

Wednesday, February 24th, 2010
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He decided not to do the beach this morning so he ran the eight-tenths of a mile to St. Armands Circle in shirtsleeves. Out the side of the hotel, across Cleveland Drive, north on the Boulevard of the Presidents on a sidewalk that divided the four-lane road like a banana split. A patriotic as well as a commercial hub, with all the cross streets named for presidents: Monroe, Jackson, Tyler, Grant, Garfield, Harrison. On Cleveland, the houses hunkered into the shell-covered driveways, squinting at the upper crust through slatted windows. The closer he got to St. Armands Circle, the more elaborate the homes became: a palatial estate with leaded oval windows in its front doors, a house on a canal with an empty boat slip.

St Armands Circle statue deserted webThere were few people on the street at this hour, a Spandex runner and a white-haired man walking a white-haired dog. But at the circle there was traffic, a half-dozen cars and a SCAT bus from Sarasota County Area Transit, laboring like a bull. The shops and restaurants were closed: the tourist attractions like Olivia’s Fashions and the Columbia Restaurant, the adobe-clad Chico’s and Starbucks, the Italianate marble columns of the Met fashion and day spa, with its three lion heads spouting water into a trough.

In the circle itself a lawn slopeed into a slight depression to catch the rain. Purple petals from what looked like hibiscus trees layered the ground and at the far end a stood a black statue of a naked man labeled “Borghese Warrior,” his penis pointing south. No need to ask for directions.

Back at the hotel an older waitress named Inka from St. Croix served them breakfast. They’d visited the island on a whim a few years ago and found it a strange mix of physical beauty and worn-out buildings in town, with an underlying tension among the workers. He mentioned the visit to Inka.

“What did it look like?” she asked in an accent that could have been German or Scandinavian.

“The homes were gated and the car lots surrounded by barbed wire.”

“Hooligans.” She screwed up her face and nearly spat the word.

“What’s it like to live there?” he asked.

“Dangerous.”

So much for paradise.

They drove around the ever-congested St. Armands Circle onto Longboat Key, land of the free and the home of the rich. North on Gulf Drive to Anna Maria Island, the northernmost part of the Sarasota keys, the place where the locals have preserved what they call “Old Florida.” Condos in adobe and terra cotta tile, smaller homes in cement block, but unlike St. Croix or Orlando, only one gated community. Through Bradenton Beach to Holmes Beach and the Art League gallery, a sky blue building with a rounded front and an oval overhang that could have been a Dairy Queen, or the home of George Jetson. Inside they viewed about two dozen photographs of “Old Florida,” which looked a lot like their backyard, only with water.

Menonite webThey walked the Anna Maria Pier on Sarasota Bay, out to the tin-roofed shack that served as bait shop and restaurant, guys casting lines into the water and drinking beer, a woman in a black dress with a baby stroller waiting with an older woman for a table inside, a row of Mennonite or Amish women in their white caps and black dresses lining one of the benches. Doubt they were waiting to fish.

Then across the street to the Waterfront Restaurant, sitting outside on the deck-like porch, watching the cyclists with their blue T-shirts and yellow caps and beak-like helmets. Road crews were stringing pipe to improve the drainage on a side street. Every few minutes a guy in a backhoe would troll by, the loader filled with muddy water. Each time he passed he’d turn his head toward the diners, a private eye looking for the errant husband, or a character in Tom Bodett’s End of the Road stories, the town’s loader operator who won first place in the parade by following the procession on his way to the gravel pit.

They had a crab sandwich and chicken croissant and iced tea, the motivational singer Cheryl Crow urging them to break down those personal barriers and live up to their fullest potential. If it makes you happy . . . . it’s probably bad for your digestion, your wallet or your marriage. They skipped dessert.

Anna Maria Island beach webOn the way back they swung to the other side of the island to see the Gulf. The water was approaching high tide (4:48 p.m.) and the wind stirred the waves, which rose to about 2 feet. There was a spatter of raindrops but not enough to deter a pair of kids who ran in the surf, or the birds, who patiently worked the shore. No tin cups, no stocking masks, yet something suspicious about the throng that gathered around his feet.

Pelican pair webThe Gull Syndicate. He recognized their colors: black do-rags over cream suits with dove-gray tails. Very elegant. Their sheer numbers startled him, but not as much as the outer guard: it was the Pelican Gang, down from the Bowery, muscle for a pending job.

Out of the crowd, strutting like a pigeon in Central Park, came a face he recognized as well as his own: Ducat, alert, wary, his head cocked to the side, one mischievous eye aglow. He’d called in reinforcements.

There was trouble in paradise.

Sarasota Noir, part 2: the league of thieves

Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010
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He went for a run on the beach. It was 7 a.m. Late by work standards. The sky hung low over the ocean. The Gulf stood green and vast, a universe unto itself. The tide had peaked and in its retreat left a line of shells along a path of hard-packed sand. Waves broke from right to left with a rush, one then another, a call and response.

Gulls strutted the beach, ignoring the few people who ran or walked or waded into the surf: a woman in her seventies in skin-tight Lycra running shorts, a group of women who appeared to be wearing white headbands beneath dark scarves, a man with a wire cage on a long handle trolling the water. One of the Gull Ducat webbirds looked familiar, cocked its head as he ran past. Gull Dukat, the thug in the restaurant in St. Petersburg, here to organize his crime syndicate. Dukat in a Creamsicle suit with a white-headed bird, dressed in a navy blue sweater and lime-green shorts. Trying to fit in. As he passed, their heads rotated like ball-turret gunners.

He pressed north, shells crunching underfoot, toward a deserted point where hummocks of weed sprouted among small dunes. Around the corner another rack of hotels lined the beach leading toward Longboat Key. Then back to the hotel, past a white-haired man waving the silver disc of a metal detector, past a heart sketched near the water, inscribed with the names Justin and Jen. May their affection outlast their artwork.

They ate a late breakfast in the grille on the eighth floor. She had eggs Benedict. He ordered oatmeal with blueberries. They both drank orange juice and looked across the intracoastal waterway into downtown Sarasota, a collection of low trees and midrise towers. In the background the B52 were saving their jukebox money for the love shack. U2 sang about a beautiful day. The sky grew overcast but there was no rain in the forecast and the Sarasota Festival of the Arts happened only once a year. They got into the car and drove downtown. Emily, the voice of the GPS device, proved to be pleasant company, guiding them over the Ringling Bridge, past the marina packed with boats and the park with the statue of the World War II serviceman kissing a nurse, her back bent, skirt flowing in the breeze.

Cubist art webAfter that the streets looked like a parking lot in Philly. Crews had barricaded Main Street. He followed a Cadillac into one of the municipal parking decks. It was full. Followed another Caddy—they were everywhere—to a side street near Whole Foods and parked in a two-hour zone. Tents housing a farmer’s market and the arts festival lined Main, Orange and Lemon streets. They jostled through the crowds, ducking under the tents when it started to rain. This was no small exhibit of arts and crafts. There was glass, painting, pottery, bronze, fiber. The level of imagination and humor was impressive. Many of the pieces could have graced a museum. Move from Ohio, buy a condo, decorate the walls with the money you would have spent on snow removal.

He took a few photos of striking works by a devotee of the Cubist school, women who were all angles and earth tones, then moved on to one of the street corners and a wall of fused glass, glowing orange through the rain. As he raised his camera, a woman—apparently the artist—yelled “Sir, sir, you can’t take pictures,” and stepped back into the gloom of her tent. On his way back to the Cubist’s tent he noticed a sign that said “no photographs.” That artist was now glowering at him. Had he known he wouldn’t have taken them, but where he came from the artists encouraged photography and reviews, any publicity they could get. Here in the big city. . . .

Then he remembered the skullcaps, the graying faces, the marauding bands of con artist and thieves roaming the beaches, the parks, the streets. Gull Dukat and his gang were in town. Just flown in from St. Petersburg, or Miami, or St. Croix. Dukat and his anonymous henchman. Crocket and Tubbs gone bad, trading smuggling for theft. The artists were on to them, even though he hadn’t seen any reward posters, no pigeons on velvet, no gulls on piers. Maybe they thought he was a lookout. Maybe he’d better keep a low profile. Dukat’s hideout had to be nearby. He’d look for it tomorrow.

Sarasota Noir: the laughing gull

Sunday, February 21st, 2010
sarasota-noir-the-laughing-gull

They had a clean flight from Allentown into Clearwater-St. Pete, less than two-and-a-half hours in the air. A warm front had pushed into the Northeast, with temperature hovering in the 40s. They walked off the plane in 60-degree sunshine, palm trees hugging the airport, ans were diverted through plywood corridors, past workers hammering at tile floors.

The crowd dispersed quickly. The luggage sat on the carousel where it was supposed to be. The woman at the rental counter surprised him when she didn’t try to sell all of those worthless things like upgrades and extra insurance.The Pier web

It was now 1:30 p.m. so they drove to the Pier off Second Avenue NE, an inverted pyramid with shops, a tubular aquarium and a franchise called ChaCha Coconuts. It’s on the rooftop deck where every table in the bar and grille comes equipped with a water-filled squirt bottle labeled “Bird B Gone.”

That didn’t fool the birds. They huddled in gangs, white gulls with their black do-rags and voices like rusty hinges and their co-conspirators, sleek brown rockets with sharp eyes and sharper beaks. She left her salad for a minute and the sleek one swooped in to steal a wonton noodle, lifting it effortlessly from the bowl like an expert mugger slicing through purse straps. The gulls were pickier: they’d eat onions but not lemon wedges. A Japanese couple tried squirting them. The gulls flew a few feet then walked the roofline, heads pulled back, laughing at the tourists. Thugs who’d mug you for a fry. Life is cheap in the tropics.

Time to move on. They fired up the GPS device and set the language to British English and a woman named Emily. Her pleasant voice guided them south on the Sunshine Skyway Bridge over Tampa Bay, its yellow cables burning in the light, two teens casting off the nearby pier. They drove through Pinellas County, through Palmetto and Bradenton and finally into Sarasota, Emily sounding only a bit annoying when she insisted on calling an exit ramp a “slip road.”

She led them across Fruitville Road and onto the Ringling Bridge, the humped-back highway that connects the city with Lido Key. Past a marina bobbing with boats and into the jaws of the roundabout at St. Armands Circle, the upscale cross between a park and a lifestyle mall and easily one of the most congested spot on the Gulf Coast. Then south for nearly a mile to the resort, a 14-story tower perched on the white sands of Lido Beach.

SAR sunset day 1 webTwo pools, a tiki hut thatched with palms by one of them, another hut on the sand. Two restaurants inside. The public spaces done in rattan and bamboo, the rooms in tile and Danish modern, the furniture blond wood with wave-like handles. Kitchen, hand-held shower wand, paddle fans, paintings of palm trees extending over surf.

Back home, it had snowed in November or December. He couldn’t remember when but knew it had been early for the season. Followed by that cold snap with a week of frigid mornings, eight above some days. Winter in the North, a time as Garrison Keillor says when you discover Mother Nature is trying to kill you.

The air felt cool in Sarasota, light-jacket weather. Before heading out he’d checked the GPS device: 2,600 mi. from home and a world away. The locals were talking as if temperatures in the mid-60s were a harbinger of the next Ice Age. To them it felt like an early spring. They ignored the critics and walked the beach, taking pictures of the sunset, letting the sand absorb the tension of the trip.

Gull webSuddenly they spotted him, the thug by the Pier in St. Pete. He was in disguise, wearing dress gray, pecking the backwash, pretending not to see them, yet all the while tracking their movements with one red-rimmed eye. Suspicious looking. Probably carrying a heater. As he cocked his head there was no mistaking that rusty voice: it was the laughing gull.